Ghost of Warriors Christmas Past reminds us how good this team is now
OAKLAND –
Merry Christmas from Oracle Arena where the Golden State Warriors – with the
addition of championship-chasing free agent Kevin Durant – are now considered
the Scrooge of the NBA, at least nationally and in the warped mind of Charles
Barkley.
Well, bah
humbug, humbaby.
I had the
opportunity to cover this franchise for 22 years and for all the jump shooting haters
out there, let me introduce you to the Ghost of Warriors Christmas Past. He
just walked in with Joe Barry Carroll’s attitude, Ralph Sampson’s limp, Chris
Webber’s pout, and P.J. Carlisemo’s bruised neck. Take my hand and fly with me
like a halfcourt shot by Stephen Curry on this journey through time and all the
bad, dysfunctional basketball I witnessed and then you will gain a greater appreciation
of these Warriors.
Let me remind you of some of the head-turning, head-scratching scenes I was around for more than two decades, save the Tiny Tim Hardaway Days of Run TMC.
Let me remind you of some of the head-turning, head-scratching scenes I was around for more than two decades, save the Tiny Tim Hardaway Days of Run TMC.
Stop now and
watch the horror as I did …
Look! There
is a frustrated George Karl going postal on Joe Barry Carroll’s locker,
trashing it like Taylor Swift does guys.
Look! There
is Chris Weber and Don Nelson engaging in a divas pissing contest about Weber
playing center or power forward. Look! There
is Tom Gugliotta replacing Webber and Nelson going to Maui!
Look! There are
the Warriors following up the Webber Faux Pass by drafting in the first round
Clifford Rozier, Joe Smith and Todd Fuller in the next three years! That’s like
stocking the pantry with Spam.
Look! There
is Latrell Sprewell trying to turn P.J. Carlisemo’s Adams apple into crushed
grapes!
Look! There
is Mike Dunleavy Jr. leaving his shooting touch at Duke and playing defense
like an umbrella in a hurricane!
Look! There
is 2000 top draft pick Chris Porter getting arrested then getting traded to the
Hornets then getting waived after missing his flight to Charlotte. The Warriors
won 57 games in three years during the Porter Error!
Look! There
goes free agent Baron Davis to the Clippers in L.A. when the Warriors, after making
the playoffs for the first time in 13 years, decide instead to pay free agent
Corey Maggette $50 million and re-sign Andris Biedrins for $63 million who
proceeds to average, coincidentally, 6.3 points per game in a 10-year NBA
career.
Look away! You
can’t stand it, can you? Call time-out. The Ghost of Warriors Christmas Past
hasn’t even gotten to Donyell Marshall. Or Larry Hughes. Or Erick Dampier. Or
Chris Cohan. This nightmare could go on longer than Kardashians.
Lest we
remind you that there is a generation of Warriors fans who only know that every
shot Curry takes is expected to go in and that the Warriors win about as often
as Donald Trump tweets.
Yet to fully
appreciate the Warriors of Present and Yet To Come, one needs to just to
conjure the Ghost of Christmas Past when the Warriors were knuckleheads and not
bobbleheads. It’s time to appreciate what the Warriors have become almost
overnight.
Feel my pain
and be grateful. These Warriors are kinder and gentler and show compassion,
even after scoring the most lopsided win in the NBA this season on Saturday
night with a 45-point victory over the Portland Trailblazers.
Look at them
now. The Warriors deliver as much joy and love in your heart as they do assists
and 3-pointers. They are fun to watch and fantastic. They are the epitome of
the Christmas spirit.
Merry
Christmas.
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